Forum… Or Against ’em

By Count Friedrich von Olsen
As a member of the media, I’m supposed to be informing others. I must confess, though, that I am really in need of some informing myself. This sudden phenomenon of what is called “Fake News” has thrown me into a tizzy. I’m a little bit behind the times and am not so computer literate, but my butler, Hudson, is quite conversant with those newfangled contraptions of the cybernetic era. One of his duties is to troll the World Wide Web for these tidbits he thinks will interest me. He prints them out and leaves them for me to peruse over breakfast…
So, imagine, if you will, me sitting in the dining room of my Lake Arrowhead chalet, a glass of orange juice or grapefruit juice in hand, fresh from a slumber and the unreal world of my dreams, confronted by these reports that, in some cases, are further fetched than my recently concluded somnolent excursions…
So, dear readers, can any of you inform me as to which of the following are true?
Mike Pompeo, the Republican congressman from Kansas who was recently nominated by President-elect Donald Trump to head the CIA, told Congress that the intelligence community has made an assessment that Russian intelligence agencies undermined or at least attempted to undermine the recently-concluded presidential election and elect Donald Trump was an “analytical product that is sound…”
Indisputable proof has surfaced that our current president was indeed born in Kenya…
That the Russians have some really embarrassing and compromising information involving our president-elect in a St. Petersburg hotel room cavorting with some micturating ladies of the evening…
Pope Francis issued an edict before the election threatening to excommunicate anyone who voted for Hillary Clinton…
Fox News has been substituting the footage of well attended rallies in the nation’s capital for footage of other lesser attended rallies to make it appear that there is a groundswell of support for ending the Affordable Care Act…
Abe Vigoda, a star of both the big screen and the small screen perhaps most famous for his role in the Godfather who was supposed to have died just about a year ago, is actually still alive…

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